News WHAT IS PEEBALL? THE SPORT THAT'S CHANGED THE WAY 1,000,000s OF MEN GO TO THE TOILET Available now for just £1. The International Peeball Federation (IPF) is delighted to announce that fully biodegradable Peeballs are available to buy on the UK high street for the very first time. These new balls have heralded the arrival of a new easy-to-learn/tough-to-master variation on the game that's sweeping the globe - Peeball. The rules of Peeball are simple: 1. Unwrap the Peeball and place it carefully in a urinal (single and trough urinals are both acceptable playing areas, although for league and competitive matches the urinals must meet the individual rules and regulations of the relevant local governing bodies). 2. Take aim and once urination has commenced, start the clock. This is 'The Stand'. All Peeball events are based on a single stand. 3. Aiming the stream at the Peeball, try to destroy it in the shortest possible time. Once all the residual fragments have been dispatched down the urinal drain, stop the clock (In championship games, points are awarded for style, technical merit and artistic interpretation. At all levels of competition, the use of penile siphons or any other artificial urinary aids is strictly forbidden). Peeball's active ingredients react violently to contact with liquid (including, of course, wee), liberating carbon dioxide gas and aqueous sodium citrate. By rolling the Peeball, creating a larger surface area, the player can speed up this reaction and achieve better time scores. This, of course, is where the skill comes into play... Matthew Sweetapple, Chairman of the International Peeball Federation made the following statement. "Ladies and gentlemen of the press. This is indeed a glorious time to be alive. For years Peeball has flourished without the support of major retailers. Ignored by mainstream media, unloved by breweries. Now, thanks to our hard-working scientists and legal teams, Power Peeball is now available in the UK. Soon, men who have never felt the joy of unleashing themselves in a competitive environment will have their lavatorial habits changed forever". "Pub-based sports have always been popular in the UK. The British have a proud history of darts, are top of the world rankings in almost all billiards sports and can be found pissing their wages up the wall on an almost nightly basis. With the introduction of Super Power Edition Peeball I anticipate an enormous upsurge in Peeball participation. It's easy to play, great fun and raises money for a great cause. At the IPF, we believe the future of British urination is in your own hands. Gentlemen, I urge you to rush to your nearest stockist and commence playing with your balls at the first available opportunity". Sweetapple then retired to a nearby urinal and, in front of a selected group of reporters and photographers destroyed a Peeball in an excellent 63 seconds. As expected, the introduction of the commercially available ball has instigated a huge upturn in Peeball participation.